Table of Contents Views and Mechanics Publisher's Note Editor's Note Review of Terrorist Review of God's Gym Review of Cherry Blossoms in Twilight Creative Nonfiction Ain't Is A Word By Marcie Hollowell & Kristen Munch Love Under the Big Top By Andy Martello Revival By Brenda G. Wooley Poetry Letting Go Wish By Antoinette Brim Pam Farwick By G. David Schwartz Confession While Dining By Mary Lou Taylor Homeschooling Adventures By Beth Happel Fiction Ike Experiences Vanity By Sidney Kidd What Keeps Me Alive By Paul Brittain Minor Damage By Jane Hammons How To Cook for Your In-Laws By Ricky Ginsburg About the Contributors © 2006, River Walk Journal and respective authors and artists. All rights reserved. Do not use or reproduce without permission. River Walk Journal, Inc. Board of Directors Chairman - Elizabeth Ross Vice Chairman - Joseph Koch Secretary/Treasurer - Geri Stock-Ross Editorial Director - Patti Kurtz, DA Literacy Director - Bill Mausteller Policy Director - PA State Rep. Jess Stairs Advisory Board Chairman - Patti Kurtz, DA Asst. Chairman - Dan Lachenman, PhD Samuel Hazo Christopher Leland Edwin Yoder Joseph Bathanti Journal Staff Publisher - Elizabeth Ross Editor-In-Chief - Joseph Koch Sen. Fiction Editor - Patti Kurtz Sen. Poetry Editor - Neeldhara Misra Sen. Creative Nonfiction Editor - Brenda Coxe Contributing Editor - Robert Dittman Publicity Director (PA) - Geri Stock-Ross For information about submissions, visit http://www.riverwalkjournal.org/subs.html. Questions about promotions, subscribers' services, and advertising should be sent to publisher@riverwalkjournal.org. River Walk Journal, Inc. is a non-profit corporation run entirely by volunteers. For information about volunteer opportunities and internships, visit VolunteerMatch.

Ike Experiences Vanity By Sidney Kidd “Ike, what’s on your mind? Forget how to talk?” Ike glared through the bug encrusted windshield and added another wrinkle to his scowl of silence. “Don’t have anything to say—huh? Well, I guess sometimes that’s the best policy.” Johnny cast a sideways glance at his dear friend as they drove down the washboard driveway of their favorite fishing hole. Twin antonymic plumes of acrid, drought stricken dust arose from beneath their mud grip tires. Born as dexterous tempests of right hand-left hand corkscrew spirals, they mingled and intertwined with aspirations towards the heavens. Held to this earth by precarious straining tethers, they billowed into an ashen gray parachute that implored restraint. Upon their passage, the roadside greenery coughed and sneezed with the settling cloud of a silver sheen. Ike’s future hung over him like the dark canopy of live oaks shadowing their dirt path. The gnarled twisted arms clawed ominously overhead allowing just enough yellow sunshine in to highlight his gray state of melancholia. The trailing talons of Spanish moss scratched across the windshield and Ike’s protruding elbow in flowing laments to his imminent demise. He caught fleeting glimpses of a happier time not so long ago, a time when he was considered a simpleton and no one expected words of wisdom or actions of virtue to emanate from his presence. Ike knew that after today, his life and state of bliss would be permanently altered for the worse...never again would he taste the sweet satisfaction of eating cold Viennas and soda crackers with his dear friend Johnny. “Damn it, Ike, I know you heard me. What’re you so mad about? That new cook at the Waffle House burn your bacon?” Ike felt Johnny’s eyes upon him—studying his profile and forming those things called conclusions. Ike hated for people to draw conclusions, especially, the foregone ones. He never wound up on the winning end of anyone’s conclusions. Once they lodged in a fellow’s brain they stuck like cockleburs to a coon dog’s ear. Johnny knew that if he persisted in poking and jabbing at Ike, he’d eventually break his vow of silence. Ike never could stand for people to stare at him. The storm was gathering upon Ike’s mental horizon as the grayish blues of his eyes deepened towards purple. Johnny knew it was only a matter of time as Ike locked his jaw and protruded his bottom lip slightly beyond his top in a boyish pout. “Yeah, only a matter of time now. Sure looks like a storm’s a brewing.” Ike tilted his head as he studied the horizon for the tell tale signs of an approaching deluge. In the confusion, he forgot what he was so determined to remember as his drawl crawled slowly across the syrupy Magnolia air. “Where you lookin’ for that there rain Johnny? There ain’t a cloud in the sky.” “Sure there is—you just have to know where to look…I brought some Vienna sausages and soda crackers to eat while we’re waiting on the fish to bite. Even got some of those Whoop Ass sodas you’re so fond of.” “Thank ya. You always was real good about ‘memberin’ stuff.” “You still like working at the Kotex factory?” “I like it just fine...when they let me sweep up and such.” “Somebody interfering with your sweeping?” “Cain’t do it no more. Tony done give me another job.” “Got a promotion, did ya?” “Tony said it didn’t look right for me to be pushing a broom after what I done.” “That’s great, Ike. What did you do to make him recognize your talent?” Ike allowed his head to sway in Johnny’s direction as it hung from his despondent demeanor, casting a sideways scowl just to make sure he wasn’t smiling at his predicament. “Ain’t they a holiday ‘bout every month these days?” “Yeah, I believe we have something to celebrate each and every month.” “Ain’t no need for no more holidays is they?” “I don’t know about need Ike...Things change in our society when we want to celebrate some meaningful event. You know...if something real important comes along, we probably want to celebrate it.” “Ain’t no room for no more though, is they?” “They’ll find room if they want to make a new holiday. Like when they decided to make Martin Luther King a holiday. They combined Washington’s Birthday and Lincoln’s into one, and called it President’s Day.” Ike recognized the irony of life, even if he wasn’t real sure of the word to describe it... “Mr. King got real famous talkin’ ‘bout his dreams a lot, didn’t he? A’fore that, folks didn’t even know he had one. Everybody got a dream, I reckon. Famous people git that way cause they say them words that other people ain’t never said before, don’t they?” “More or less.” “They can do stuff like that? Move real important people’s birthdays around, to what suits them? Don’t hardly seem right. If they is important enough to be remembered don’t look like nobody got the right to move their birthday.” “Yeah, the government can do whatever it likes.” “Them’s the ones what’s in charge of holidays...the government?” “Most of the time.” “Them women at the health department work for the government, don’t they?” “Kind of. Why are you asking?” “Just wonderin’. Folks all over the world really like Christmas, don’t they?” “You worried about Christmas?” “Don’t do no good to worry. Says in the Good Book that we ain’t s’pose to worry. Them little birds in them briars don’t worry and we ain’t meant to neither.” Johnny was getting closer all the time. Now he needed to ignore what was bothering Ike and just let it fester for a while. “Ike, where do you think those Crappie will be today?” “Around them dead Christmas trees we put out first of the year. They like them trees real good, ‘cause them little shiny minners hides up in there. Don’t you reckon, them minners looks a lot like them silver icicles you dangle off a Christmas tree?” “I’d imagine they do—now that you mention it. Probably looks like Christmas all year long down there on the bottom.” “That’s kind’a what I was a thinkin’ too.” “Something bothering you about those minnows?” “No, I was just thinkin’, about what they looked like.” Johnny had been around Ike all his life and he realized that this wasn’t the normal, run-of-the-mill, bout of Ike’s wondering. Ike always got stuck on words and ideas. Sometimes he’d ponder about a word for an hour or two, but he’d always ask Johnny before he let it go on this long. Maybe what Ike needed was a little distraction to loosen up his tongue just a little. “Ike, what have those Yankees been up to at the Kotex factory?” And the staccato drip became a raging deluge as Ike’s tongue broke free, allowing his dammed up thoughts to overflow his banks...“They up to the same old mess...using them big old words and laughing when I gits a mouthful of ‘em. Some of them words’ll just ‘bout choke you and make your tongue slap your brains out. Ain’t no tellin what would happen if you got too carried away with sayin’ a whole bunch of ‘em at one time. Words sure are a perplexity, ain’t they Johnny?” “Where’d you get that new word—perplexity?” “What causes folks to feel so important when they say all them big fancy words? What causes that Johnny?” “I guess it has a lot to do with vanity. People have this idea of how important people are supposed to behave. When they begin to feel important they just unconsciously begin playing the role of the character.” “They talk about that vanity a lot in the Good Book. There’s been more people than you can count that got a hold of that vanity. I reckon it’s a powerful attraction to resist.” “I guess so, Ike. People don’t even realize they’ve changed. Probably wonder why their friends begin shunning them. In their minds they rationalize that everyone is jealous of their success.” “That’s a bad thang—losing your friends—especially if you only got one. All folks that smile at you ain’t your friend. Sometimes they just doing a thing called humoring you while they tap their foot under the table hoping you’ll leave soon. That’s the way them ladies down to the health department do when I go in there to git one of them shots. They talk real friendly and extra loud with their friends, but they go to frowning and staring at me when I come in. They call that condescending—that’s one of the words I’ve been practicing. Condescending—that’s a real perty word. Folks around here don’t use it too much. My mama says them kind of people are looking down their noses because they think they farther up that social ladder than we are. Mama says they just think they got their foot a little higher, ‘cause they got their hands stretched way out in front of their eyes looking at them little pictures that them Chinese ladies painted on their fake finger nails.” “Well we don’t need to worry about anything like that—do we Ike? We’ll always have each other. You ready to wet a hook and catch some fish?” “Yeah I reckon, being as how we come all the way down here.” “Ike, throw the minnow bucket in the water to keep them fresh.” “They sure is shiny and silvery like, ain’t they?” “Yeah, they sure are. Just like icicles hanging off the eave of the house.” “That’s a real perty picture, them little minners hanging by their tails, dancing in the sunlight. Ain’t it funny how people’s words can paint a picture like that? Tony, down at work, said that painting pictures with your words can get you real famous.” “Yeah, I guess so Ike.” “Johnny, don’t you reckon folks all over the world would git real mad if a fella was to mess up something they all liked? Even though it wasn’t done on purpose or out of meanness or vanity neither?” “I suppose most people would. It depends on the circumstances and how severe the mess up was. You in some kind of trouble at work?” “No, they all think I’m a genius cause of what I done.” “Okay Ike, this has gone on long enough. Tell me what kind of trouble you’ve got yourself into so I can help you get out.” There was no hesitation in Ike’s response because he dearly wanted Johnny’s help in freeing him of this heavy burden that he carried around. “I gave Tony one of them words I’ve been learning—remember how you told me that people judge you by the words you use? You sure was right, ‘cause he gave that word to some real important people and they all went to recognizing me.” “What do you mean recognizing you?” “They said in recognition of my contribution to the team effort I was a gittin my own special holiday. Said it was a thang called a floating holiday and I had to take it every year ‘cause they liked my word so good.” “That’s a good thing Ike. Why would you think you’re in trouble?” “They said I had to take it on Christmas Day cause that was the only day they could spare me. That way folks all over the world could celebrate ‘Ike’s Special Holiday’. They said I had a new job thinking of ways to make people buy more Kotex. Said it weren’t befittin’ a man of my distinction, to be pushing no broom around. I tried to tell them that I find most of my words when I’m sweepin’ the floor, but they just kept right on talking about how they was gonna celebrate my holiday. What is I gonna do? Them big distinguishing words done got me in a mess this time. I reckon I’m in more trouble than I’m liable to ever git out of. I wish I’d left all them words alone and just said the ones that I growed up with. None of this would never, have ever happened and the Good Lord wouldn’t have to change his birthday around just to suit me and my vanity. I’m about the vanest person you ever gonna meet Johnny. I done noticed how I’m acting and a setting different in the car, all distinguished and professorly like. I even started expecting them perks that come with my new position...That’s short for perquisite, it means thangs you entitled to just ‘cause you more special than other folks. I ain’t a gonna be able to eat them Viennas and soda crackers with you no more—or drink them Whoop Ass soda pops neither. It just ain’t somethin a feller of my social standin’ and responsibility is got time to do. Mama says I think slower than most and I figure it’s gonna take all my time figurin’ out how to git folks to buy more Kotex. I’m sorry I messed everything up Johnny. That vanity just got up in me and I went to spouting out them fancy words like they weren’t no tomorrow. Things like that is got repercussions—just like moving around them president’s birthdays. I reckon God is gonna be real mad with me about taking over his son’s birthday the way I done. Probably be best if you ain’t too close around me...just in case he wants to take me back up yonder and fuss at me.” “Nobody is going to move Christmas, Ike. They’re just pulling your leg and getting one over on you. They give you Christmas Day off every year. You don’t have anything to worry about, I promise.” “That the God’s honest truth?” “It sure is Ike. They’re just making fun of you.” “And I ain’t gonna have to quit sweepin’ neither?” “I’d imagine, come the first of the year you’ll be back doing what you love.” “That sure takes a load off my mind, that’s for sure. I feel like I been dragging’ a anvil through a briar patch worrying and a fretting. It’d shore, limit my vocabulary if I weren’t allowed to sweep no more.” “You should have told me all this to begin with. I missed talking about all the things we normally talk about.” Ike smiled his genuine smile as he reached over and shook Johnny’s hand real professional like, then nodded his head to seal their contractual agreement. “What was that word that you let them borrow, Ike?” Ike straightened, bowing out his chest and increasing his height to match his stature. He tugged at his bibbed “overhauls” and cleared his throat to begin his acceptance speech all over again, just like he’d been practicing all night. “Pearlescent…They was a pondering on how to describe them tampon things so they sounded real perty and feminine like, when folks read the box. I told them they looked pearlescent to me—especially considering the places where the women be putting them tampons. Kind of reminded me of a oyster, with that little grain of sand irritating them till they turned it into something real beautiful that folks wrap around their finger when they fall in love. That marketing director done put it right on that colorful box and everything. Only he left out the part about the fingers and love, said that painted too vibrant a picture for his pastel colored boxes. It sure feels good to paint vibrant pictures with your words, don’t it Johnny?” “It sure does...Feels real good. I’m proud of you Ike.” “Johnny, them fellers said they was gonna put my picture on a billboard right on the Interstate, aside the Waffle House. Said it was gonna be a great big picture of me holding up one of them tampons by the string like I done caught it fishing. Said it was gonna say… ‘Ike says he catches the great big ones with pearlescence’. You reckon they really gonna do all that? I’m scared all that vanity will just git right back up in me all over again...setting there eating my bacon and waffles looking at myself outside the winder, all loud and boastful like them health department women.” “I believe you can keep yourself in line just fine, Ike. Yes sir, you’re about the least vain person I’ve ever met.” “Well, what do you reckon I should wear for that picture?”